Forget the diet, folks!

We’re about to embark on a sugar-fueled adventure across the Buckeye State that’ll make your taste buds dance and your waistline cry for mercy!

1. Pistacia Vera (Columbus)

Our first stop is Pistacia Vera in Columbus, where sophistication meets sugar rush.

This isn’t your average corner bakery – it’s more like the Louvre of pastries if the Louvre smelled like butter and happiness.

The storefront, with its sleek black awning and “OPEN” sign that practically winks at you, is as inviting as a warm hug from your favorite aunt.

Inside, it’s a feast for the eyes (and soon, the stomach).

Display cases gleam with jewel-like macarons in every color of the rainbow, and let me tell you, these aren’t your run-of-the-mill macarons.

They’re so perfectly crafted, you almost feel bad eating them.

Almost.

But the real star of the show?

The pistachio croissant.

It’s like they took the essence of pistachio, wove it into layers of buttery, flaky pastry, and sprinkled it with fairy dust.

One bite, and you’ll be planning your move to Columbus faster than you can say “real estate agent.”

2. The Fat Apple Bakery (Bridgeport)

Next up, we’re heading to Bridgeport to visit The Fat Apple Bakery.

Now, don’t let the name fool you – there’s nothing “fat” about this place except maybe your chances of falling in love with every single thing they bake.

The exterior is a whimsical wonderland that looks like it was designed by Willy Wonka’s more practical cousin.

A pink playhouse sits out front, complete with candy decorations that’ll make you wonder if you’ve stumbled into a life-size gingerbread house.

Inside, it’s a chocolate lover’s paradise.

Their signature apple fritters are the size of your face and packed with enough cinnamon-sugar goodness to make you forget about all those times you swore off carbs.

And don’t even get me started on their chocolates – they’re so good, you’ll want to build a shrine to cocoa beans in your living room.

3. Schneider’s Bakery (Westerville)

Our third stop takes us to Schneider’s Bakery in Westerville, a place that’s been serving up sweet treats since before your grandparents were courting.

This isn’t just a bakery; it’s a time machine disguised as a donut shop.

The red awnings and classic storefront will transport you back to a simpler time when calories didn’t exist and everyone knew their neighbor’s name.

Inside, it’s like stepping into a Norman Rockwell painting, if Norman Rockwell had an obsession with glazed perfection.

Their donuts are the stuff of legend.

We’re talking light-as-air confections that practically float off the shelf and into your mouth.

The maple bacon long john?

It’s like breakfast and dessert had a beautiful, delicious baby.

You’ll want to buy a dozen, eat them all, and then go back for more.

Don’t worry, we won’t judge.

4. Brezel (Columbus)

Back to Columbus we go, this time to Brezel, where they’re twisting up tradition one pretzel at a time.

This isn’t your average mall pretzel joint – it’s more like a carb-loaded art gallery.

Tucked away in North Market, Brezel is a pretzel paradise.

Their hand-rolled pretzels come in flavors that’ll make your head spin faster than a carnival ride.

Jalapeno cheddar?

Check.

Rosemary garlic?

You bet.

They’ve even got a pretzel that tastes like an everything bagel, because why should bagels have all the fun?

But the real showstopper?

Their pretzel buns.

These pillowy wonders of gluten are so good, you’ll want to write sonnets about them.

Shakespeare, eat your heart out (or better yet, eat a pretzel).

And don’t even get me started on their dipping sauces.

It’s like they’ve bottled joy and served it in little plastic cups.

The beer cheese?

It’s a religious experience.

One dip and you’ll be speaking in tongues – mostly “mmm” and “more, please.”

The honey mustard?

It’s tangy, it’s sweet, it’s everything you never knew you needed in life.

You’ll find yourself buying extra pretzels just to have an excuse to keep dunking.

Before you know it, you’re elbow-deep in pretzel crumbs, wondering if it’s socially acceptable to lick the sauce container clean.

Spoiler alert: at Brezel, it probably is.

5. Cherbourg Bakery (Bexley)

Our fifth stop brings us to Cherbourg Bakery in Bexley, where gluten-free isn’t just an afterthought – it’s the main event.

This charming little bakery proves that you don’t need gluten to have a good time.

The turquoise storefront is as refreshing as a cool breeze on a hot summer day.

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Step inside, and you’re greeted by a display case that looks like it was curated by the fairy godmother of baked goods.

Their cinnamon rolls are so gooey and delicious, you’ll swear they’re held together by magic instead of flour.

And don’t even get me started on their cookies – they’re chewy, they’re crispy, they’re everything a cookie should be and more.

You’ll leave wondering if maybe, just maybe, gluten was holding you back this whole time.

6. Dough Mama (Columbus)

Back in Columbus, we’re stopping at Dough Mama, where pie is elevated to an art form.

This isn’t just a bakery; it’s a shrine to all things flaky and filled.

The cheerful yellow exterior is like a beacon of buttery hope in a world of kale smoothies and juice cleanses.

Inside, it’s cozy and inviting, like your cool aunt’s kitchen – if your cool aunt was a pie-baking wizard.

Their pies are the stuff of dreams.

We’re talking crusts so flaky they should come with a warning label for mess potential.

The Ohio Apple pie?

It’s like taking a bite out of the best parts of fall.

And their savory hand pies?

They’re basically a hug wrapped in pastry.

You’ll want to try them all, diet be damned.

7. Bake Me Happy (Columbus)

Our penultimate stop is Bake Me Happy in Columbus, where nostalgia is served up with a side of sprinkles.

This gluten-free bakery is proof that the universe loves us and wants us to be happy.

The bright orange awning is like a ray of sunshine on a cloudy day.

Step inside, and you’re transported back to your childhood – minus the awkward braces and bad haircuts.

Their Oatmeal Creme Clouds are like the love child of an oatmeal cream pie and a cloud.

The Spongies?

They’re basically Twinkies that went to finishing school.

Everything here is gluten-free, but trust me, you won’t miss the gluten one bit.

You’ll be too busy planning your next visit.

8. Sweet Mary’s Bakery (Akron)

Our final stop takes us to Sweet Mary’s Bakery in Akron, where they’re baking up a storm of deliciousness.

This place is the definition of small but mighty.

The storefront, with its classic black and white color scheme, is as timeless as the perfect chocolate chip cookie.

Inside, it’s a cozy haven of sugary scents and friendly faces.

Their cakes are works of art that taste even better than they look – and they look pretty darn amazing.

The cookies?

They’re the kind of cookies that make you want to pour a giant glass of milk and forget about adulting for a while.

And don’t even get me started on their pies – they’re so good, you’ll want to write a thank-you note to whoever invented fruit.

So there you have it, folks – a sugar-coated journey through Ohio’s sweetest spots.

Cravings are calling!

Use this map to steer your food journey in the right direction—and maybe discover a hidden gem or two along the way.

Your dentist might not thank you, but your taste buds certainly will.

Now, if you’ll excuse me, I need to go for a 10-mile run… or maybe just a nap.